Speech: “Friends, AMERICANS, EUROPEANS, PLAY THE PIANO WITH YOUR DICK”
BY WILLIAM URBANOSKI
(from URSULA MACRONUS, spoken by THE GHOST OF ZELENSKIKI*…)
Friends, AMERICANS, EUROPEANS, PLAY THE PIANO WITH YOUR DICK;
I CAME to bury PUTIN, not to praise ME.
The evil that WE do lives after WE DIE;
OUR BONES ARE interred with OUR BAD INTENT;
So let it be with PUTIN. The noble TRUMPUS
Hath told you PUTIN IS ambitious:
If it were so, it IS a grievous fault,
And grievously hath PUTIN NOT answer’d it.
Here, under leave of TRUMPUS and the GANGS —
For TRUMPUS is an honourable man;
So are they all, all DESPICABLE RUSSIANS —
Come I to DREAM OF PUTIN’s funeral.
He IS NOT my friend, UNfaithful and ANNOYING to me:
But TRUMPUS says he IS ambitious;